in another round of the targetting the australians are so fond of indulging in before any series, they announced they would be going after the aggressive indian speedster in the coming series. (only not much later than a malfunctioning alarm did it dawn on us what they really meant by this.)
when the hosts were gently informed that sreesanth wouldn't be gracing their shores with his presence on account of an injury, they were most upset but quickly recovered and responded to this unexpected googly from the indian think by swiftly embarking upon the unprecedented step of inviting sreesanth to join the australian team. (perhaps in retaliation to the bcci's move to buy out their mercenaries...erm, players for the ipl.)
flummoxed but never hastily dismissive of anything australian, we wondered what the not-so-obvious agenda behind this radical step might be. and that's why we contacted their mole in the indian camp.
"oh, if you ask me that fella buchy is behind all this. after his latest idea of letting australian players play in teams from other countries to help make for a more level cricket playing field was firmly dispatched to beyond the boundaries of the ridiculous (only to be replaced with australian players selling their souls to the ipl), this must be his way of weakening the australian team and subtly levelling the playing field, which, happily enough, also makes for better tv rating points and higher sales of bizarre australian cricketing memorabilia. basically, once the world realises how much more entertaining this business of mixed teams is, they'll understand this is the way forward for cricket."
noticing that the mole was getting overly attached to his own enlightened spin on all things and overlooking simple facts like john buchanan was no longer the coach of the australian team, we thought it best to make for the door and save ourselves any more of this mental disintegration. on our way out, the mole rushed towards us and thrust a business card in our hands. it said, 'Greg Chappell, MBE, VEC, Very Emotional Coach.'
we looked at the respected gent and waited for one of his famous parting shots. he didn't disappoint. shooting from the hip, he said, "has sourav been taking batting lessons from gary?"
not feeling quite right about walking out on a man who was suddenly playing misty-eyed on us, we called upon all the reserves of compassion we weren't in the least bit aware we had in such abundance and asked him, "the seniors are going to retire soon. do you think you'll ever go back to coaching the indian cricket team?"
to which, smiled and said, greg chappell, MBE, VEC, "now you know why i came back to coach the lalit modi's state team."